Fall 2020

Leading up to the fall of 2020, I had prayed for many years for the country of Italy and whether or not it was God's will for me to do ministry there. While cleaning out my room, I even discovered a journal from when I was 14-yrs-old in which I wrote several entries and prayers concerning Italy. Despite several attempts to do a semester of study abroad in Italy while I was completing my undergraduate degree at Charleston Southern University, God continually closed the doors. Instead, He waited until the midst of a pandemic before He made it possible for me to finally arrive in Italia.

Calvary Chapel Bible College Italy

After graduating from CSU, I decided I wanted to attempt to do a semester of Bible college to allow for some time between my undergrad and my graduate studies. I felt like the Lord was calling me to slow down. My life in school had always been a non-stop rollercoaster of academics, work, ministry, and school related activities. Exhausted, I desired to take a step back and simply rest in the Lord - to wait on Him and to listen for His direction. I thought that a semester or two of Bible college would be the perfect place in which to do so. When I discovered that Calvary Chapel had a CCBC campus in Italy, I prayed that it would finally be the right opportunity to go and ascertain whether God had a purpose for me there or not.

Despite the semester almost getting cancelled and the numerous layers of Covid-19 restrictions for international travel, God landed me in Venezia with a beautiful plan for my life to be revealed.

The Life-Long Lesson of Discernment

Throughout the semester, I thoroughly enjoyed the small group of students, getting to know the staff and congregation at Calvary Chapel Montebelluna, and fumbling through the language barrier to discover the people and the cities of Italy. There certainly was nothing disappointing about my time as a student!

What I did not expect was to wait so long to decide what I was going to do after the semester. I kept praying and seeking, getting counsel from strong Christians, and making pros and cons lists! However, God kept waiting patiently for me to understand that He simply wanted me to surrender control and take a step of faith. He doesn't often give us a thunderous answer to our endless questions. In fact, it is quite rare. Instead, He calls us deeper into a relationship of trust and asks us to actually exercise the faith we claim to possess. When I finally approached the pastor about an opportunity to intern the next semester at the church/Bible college, the confirmation from the Lord was undeniable!

It is too easy to desire the full plan up-front. As human beings, we want to be in the know. We want to be the one directing and giving commands. Sometimes we tell ourselves, "If God would just tell me plainly what He wants me to do next," or "If He tells me what the right choice is," "...then I will do it. I will completely trust Him." But, this is a false promise and an erroneous form of faith. When we are immovable as mountains waiting for God to give us specific instructions, we will remain immovable. Rather, when we place our trust in God and simply step forward, God will direct those steps. He will guide us and work in spectacular ways.

As the fall semester drew to an end, I made preparations to return as an intern. Over the winter break, I continued to pray over the decision and ask that God would be glorified in all that I did. Part of what made the decision so difficult to make was the worry that I wanted this to be God's will for my sake. However, Scripture is clear that as we draw closer to God and are conformed into the image of His Son, our will becomes aligned with His will. As we love Him more, our desires become His desires. Thus, as I sought His will over mine, I became confident that this desire was not of myself but from the Lord. Discernment can be difficult, and it feels like we re-learn it's lessons each time we face a new and important decision, but it is not to be feared.

And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? (Matthew 6:27, ESV)

Wait on the Lord, pray persistently, seek godly counsel, and then take a step of faith!